money money money

so i say...
its the END of the month.

tt means..
$$$$$$
im happpyyyy....NOT!

we got separated quickly..
1 lump sum of it, for the parents.
2/3 of it.. the insurance, the LOANS..
and 1/3 of it, for my own expenses.

IM TOTALLY BROKE for the month.
as a matter of fact, MONTHLY.

it doesnt help with having nite shifts.
i wonder when is the day coming for me..
FOR SHOPPING!

it irks me seeing those displayed stuffs, knowing tt i can afford it but cant buy it.
n results in me
not touching it, OR even looked at it.
u call this window- shopping.
but for me,
for not seeing or touching it,
makes the temptation even lesser.

mum says 'stop buying ur korean DVDs!'
n i say.. 'i cant. its the only thing tt keeping me in, entertained'
i noe i sound pathetic.
but tts the way i lived.

i really hope tt HE sees this,
or mayb some close acquataines of his..
can mayb pass this message to HIM..

GIVE ME BACK MY MONEY!

for which, i noe..
SHE has sensed it.
due to my cries of money almost everyday.
n the tone im speaking,
whenever HE was brought up.

for which..
SHE reminded me again of my late grandad's words..
"rezeki kita bukan pada kita, tapi untuk org lain...."
after which,
i juz shut up my mouth, closed the door to the bedroom,
and layankan my Korean drama.

LAGI BEST!
hmph!